Genesis 22: 1-19 Sacrifice: suffering out of love

Then God said: “Take your son Isaac, your only one, whom you love,..
God knew Abraham loves Isaac his only beloved son, yet he asked Abraham to offer Isaac to him; and Abraham did not refuse God his only beloved son


The truth is that it was God who did not refuse to give us his only Beloved Son for our own good.  Abraham ended up sacrifice the ram God provided for him; but God actually did give up his only Beloved Son for us.  Jesus actually became man, lived with us, shared our lot, taught us about the Father,  about man, suffered, died, and rose for us.


Many will read the story of God's Love for mankind with an indifferent attitude.  Many others read it with somewhat familiarity.  But only those who have at least once in their life sacrificed their beloved ones or things or self will partly understand the love that God had for them.   God who sacrifices himself for us will also empower us to sacrifice ourselves for others.  It is not out of cruelty or vanity that God asks us to sacrifice ourselves.  Rather, it is because God wants us to know how wonderful it is  to love and to be loved.  Sacrifice ourselves a little and we will know more of the crazy love that God has for us.  How else in the world can we know love?  because the only way to show our love, to grow in love, is to suffer a little, or lots more, for the one we love.  Only through that test of sacrifice, or suffering out of love, that we know we really love or are loved.


So help us, Lord!

When Jesus likes someone so much,

He graces her with fire and wind

fire of love, wind of passionate service

He calls her to himself and entrusts to her a scarlet secret

the world couldn't understand it

even she, sometimes, didn't quite grasp it all

but she lived as though both knowing and searching for that secret

many loved her

but many more mistook her

even the one with the privilege of listening to her heart

she labored in the quiet dark,

prayed as though the Spirit was her thoughts and breath

and steadily slipped into the scarlet secret

fewer and fewer "companions" accompanied her

till that morning

when the sun hasn't set 

the hangover of a teen isn't quite over yet

and the mission is, as it seemed, about to begin

that scarlet Rose, wet, beautiful, velvet, 

rising early, shouting the good news on her feet

forever gone in sleep

chosen, and picked

by the Gardener Himself

i rushed to her side

taking some last looks

lingered over the velvet fragrant of the scarlet

couldn't resist a faint hope for God's glory and the garden's sake

when her side i had to leave at last, she saw me to my way

showing her smiles, her happy chatters, her quick steps

her way of saying good bye, of encouragement

thank you for your kindness

for waiting for me to come

for being with me so strongly, in spirit

for letting me cry for you

missing you

and still, hope for God's glory...

for even when we don't deserve you

we do need you, our Scarlet!

(for you my sister, Sr. Theresa Thanh Huong,OP. i miss you so!)

making choice--saying prayer

"toi,

di giua hoang hon

nghe nang chieu roi"

"i,

walk in the sunset

listen to the fading light"

for this choice i'm making

there is some freedom

some lost, some gain

some pain untold and unaccounted for

some fear, some doubt

have i been selfish?

if there is love

there will be certainty

if there is true freedom

there will be peace

there will be growing and

always, the sadness of being broken

of saying goodbye

all these, with an acute pain

there grows compassion,

understanding, and a step toward the end

will this story be told

be learned, and appreciate

will it become music for the stars

or just another thump echoed from the main avenue

it all depends, by whom was the choice made

a priest or a prostitute

mistake is inevitable

but love, hopefully, will reign in the end

may it be. amen

Who is God?

who is God?

If God is he who he should be, a Creator above and beyond my creatureliness, then this would be an absurd stupid vain question.  it's worse than a grass blade trying to understand me.  heck, even i can't  fathom my own existence much less...

despite this reality, if there is a question, there must be an answer some where out there.  the problem is that i don't know how to reach out and grasp the answer.

there is a hopeful solution, however, if God is who he  should be, having all the power and care enough about my question.  i can't reach out to grasp God's reality, but God can reach down and in and make Himself known to me.

Who are you, God?

Some one beyond my creatureliness.  whence come this notion of some one above and beyond mankind-God?  live barely long enough and anyone will experience our limitless ways of limitations.  wonderfully made and assemble together as human beings are, we're like a wild flower, glorious one moment, wither the next.  yet, we won't stop philosophizing and complicating our lives and the universe.

dear God, this complicate working universe points to an intelligent engineer; this awesome creation sings of a creative artist; this huge puzzle in the making speaks of an amazing planner who cares enough to piece life and lives together; the story of mankind and of each person tell of a magnificent writer;  everything good and awesome and making sense speak of a master mind behind all this.  then there must be you out there (or could be in here!), the One who is credited for all these things which some of us witness and pay attention to and even study them.

but dear God, there's also disappointment, bitterness, failures, broken heart, ignorance, pride, injustice, evil in short out there.  when we face these in life, we don't know how to reconcile them with the wonders of the world. and then, there are many whose lives were overshadowed by this darkness of evil more than light and they naturally forget what light is.

God, if you are who you should be: all good, all powerful, all loving.  please forgive me for saying "if", and forgive us for letting darkness overshadowing our lives.  please shed your light into our minds, reach out and reach into our hearts, heal us of our brokenness, make whole again what you have created, and bring to completion what you have begun in each and all of us.

The Story of the Fox and the Little Prince

"nothing is perfect," sighed the fox...

"my life is very monotonous," he said.  "i hunt chickens; men hunt me.  all the chickens are just alike, and all the men are just alike.  and, in consequence, i am a little bored.  but if you tame me, it will be as if the sun came to shine on my life.  i shall know the sound of a step that will be different from all the others. other steps send me hurrying back underneath the ground.  yours will call me, like music, out of my burrow.  and then look: you see the grain-fields down yonder?  i do no eat bread.  wheat is of no use to me.  the wheat fields have nothing to say t me.  and that is sad.  but you have hair that is the color of gold.  think how wonderful that will be when you have tamed me!  the grain, which is also golden, will bring me back the thought of you.  and i shall love to listen to the wind in the wheat..."

the fox gazed at the little prince, for a long time.

"please--tame me!" he said.

"i want to, very much," the little prince replied.  "but i have not much time.  i have friends to discover, and a great many things to understand"

"One only understands the things that on tames," said the fox.  "men have no more time to understand anything.  they buy things all ready made at the shops.  but there is no shop anywhere where one can buy friendship, and so men have no friends any more.  if you want a friend, tame me..."

"what must i do, to tame you?" asked the little prince.

"you must be very patient," replied the fox.  "first you will sit down at a little distance from me--like that--in the grass.  i shall look at you out of the corner of my eye, and you will say nothing.  words are the source of misunderstandings.  but you will sit a little closer to me, everyday..."

the next day the little prince cam back.

"it would have been better to come back at the same hour," said the fox.  "if, for example, you come at four o'clock i the afternoon, then at three o'clock i shall begin to be happy.  i shall feel happier and happier as the hour advances.  at four o'clock, i shall already be worrying and jumping about.  i shall show you how happy i am!  but if you come at just any time, i shall never know at what hour my heart is to be ready to greet you ...  One must observe the proper rites..."

what is a rite?" asked the little prince.

"those also are actions too often neglected," said the fox.  "they are what make one day different from other days, one hour from other hours.  there is a rite, for example, among my hunters.  every Thursday they dance with the village girls.  so Thursday is a wonderful day for me! i can take a walk as far as the vineyards.  but if the hunters danced at just any time, every day would be like every other day, and i should never have any vacation at all."

so the little prince tamed the fox.

(excerpt from THE LITTLE PRINCE by Antoine de Saint-Exupery)

my prayer

Lord, give me the desire for the task you entrusted to me, the necessary abilities to fulfill it, and an ardent love to ready to suffer till its completion. Amen

A Prayer for my Mother

Mother how i miss you these days when you're abroad and i can't communicate with you.  i pray for you every day and every night that you're well taken care of by our Lord and are happy and will eventually find peace and joy in your old age. 

you have suffered so much throughout your life. 

you didn't marry the one you love but the one your parents designed.  I know Dad was very good to you and love you very much; he's such a sweet simple husband.  but that doesn't make you happy because Dad is not a perfect man, and when one doesn't love one finds faults and disappointment sometimes fills your heart.  how i pray you'll find the good side of Dad and be happy with what is given you, but it is hard, very hard for you.  and i don't blame you for that anymore.

You work so hard throughout your life to raise nine of us; many sleepless anxious nights; many toils to find the means for our survival and education; many struggles with the oppressive leaders;  and till this days you still spend every thread of the left energy you have to raise your grandchildren, saving every single pennies to help those less fortunate than us.  your children complain about your thrifty life style, but being an experience woman of many ups and downs in life, and in part also of your stubborn, you resolutely hold on to  your conviction. 

you have been ill most of your middle age into your old age.  countless times rushing in and out of hospitals, dozen of operations, and taking pills as your daily portion, you still shine that smile whenever you see others.  who could have guess that under much enthusiasm conversations is the endless internal and psychological pains you have to endure.

Mother, i could go on and on about you, a woman of iron will in matters related to your loved ones, sharp mind in dealings, but such tender heart for those who suffer.  i was never a good daughter to you and never will be able to measure up your great maternal heart and mind; but what i fail to accomplish, i ask my Lord daily to make it up to you. 

My dear Lord, i pray for my mother's peace, happiness, meek and humble at heart.  if one day you shall take her away from our earthly presence (though i will not know how to do without her), i pray that you will real soon hold her in your heart and let she knows that she is loved, very much, by You and all of us. Amen.